Effendy Lie

Discussing about success habits. There are good ones that you can add to your life. But there are also some anti-success habits. Things that will be a barrier to success if you don’t get rid of them. 

And, of course, the main reason why you might be behaving in a counterproductive way is that you’re not aware of it. So, it’s important to really think hard. Do I do these things? At least maybe sometimes. So, what might these failure habits be? 

Well, the list could be huge. But I’d like to single out six that I think are common and really damaging which you may not realise.

Being Negative

Negative thinking and negative statements. This habit will certainly hold you back. You’ll reject ideas that could’ve been useful. You’ll become discouraged when things aren’t going as easy as you’d like, and you’ll make other people less keen to work with you. 

Negative people is an energy drainer, they suck all the positive energy out of us to fuel their relentless hunger for negativity, leaving us drained, exhausted, and unhappy. 

We all know people who are negative, and I think you’d agree, they’ll never get anywhere being like that. The only question is whether you sometimes can be negative in some situations. 

No matter how bad you think your situation is, you can still be thankful for what you have – whether that’s your health, your family, or simply the fact that you’re alive on this amazing planet. 

Keep a positive attitude and surround yourself with positive people who leave you feeling upbeat and energized. In the words of Zig Ziglar says, “The healthiest of all human emotions is gratitude.”

Worry

Worry is a version of fear. And, if you let your fears control you too much, then it will have a similar effect to being negative. You won’t even start on a road toward succeeding at something. 

FEAR is the acronym for False Evidence Appearing Real. Mostly, there is no true threat and immediate physical danger or the loss of someone or something dear to us.

You won’t take the necessary risks, and you won’t ask for help when you need it. Third is resistance to advice. Trying to do it all yourself and refusing to listen to people who have good logical arguments and facts. 

It can even result in lack of learning and failure to gain the skills that you need. Clearly, it’s much easier to succeed if you have other people to help you. And that means letting them help you. And being humble enough to ask them for their views and to really listen. 

Talking Too Much

It’s such a tempting habit to talk all the time instead of listening. But it will hold your success back. Listening to others improve relationships in personal and professional lives, as people tend to like those who listen to them.

It’s no excuse to say, if you are a chatty person is a habit, you can change it. Become a great listener instead and you’ll learn more and be liked more. Never let your voice be the one echoing in your head after a conversation. 

Being a good listener is similar to having good manners. It’s a quality that doesn’t seem to be a social requirement any longer, but if you practice it, it sets you apart from the crowd and makes others gravitate toward you.

Being Aggressive

Aggression includes everything from assuming that other people are bound to be wrong, to being impatient, rude, interrupting, criticizing, being loud and refusing to listen to or respect other people’s point of view. 

The key is to think about the other person’s position, as well as your own. They have equal rights and they probably have good reasons for what they’re saying and doing. So, make it a habit to hold yourself back and give them a chance. 

Playing the Victim

I think that many people who are difficult are psychological games players. Particularly those who play the victim in order to manipulate others. 

They choose a victim role in order to ask for help or to get sympathy. Or to be able to make mistakes and get away with it. Or to blame others who have it easier. But in the end, being a victim is not going to make them successful. But often, they’re not aware of it. 

And they end up sabotaging their own efforts, as well as destroying their relationships with other people. So their victim position becomes a reality and they don’t really know why. So if you feel that life is unfair or that you’re often the victim of other people’s behavior, this could be a sign that you’re in a games playing loop.

You can get out of it once you know that you’re doing it. So please do investigate this games playing and try to eradicate this failure habit. 

So is there a bad habit that you have? Are you sometimes a big negative? Do you worry too much? Are you not as good as you could be about taking advice from other people? Do you tend to talk a bit much? Are you sometimes a bit aggressive? Let’s call it overly assertive. And do you sometimes play games? Particularly the temptation to play the victim?

Tell me what you think and comments below.